Cuneiform in the digital age: in full swing

Since I'm making very minimal progress on a memo I'm supposed to complete by Monday, I might as well take a break and blog. I'm sitting at my neighborhood Dunkin' Donuts having enjoyed a "Watermelon Coolata" on an oppressively hot day. Total grams from sugar? 61.

I'm full swing into "Summer Sequence 2," which is thankfully much more qualitative and less quantitative than the last. I am having a blast in "Communications and Public Policy" which mainly consists of reading journal articles on political science, social policy and governance (domestic and foreign), which we then discuss in class. I'm in heaven. My other course, "Introduction to Public Policy" is more about developing an adequate analytical lens through which to evaluate and recommend policy solutions given different social problems. This, in my opinion, is another winner of a class. This is why I came to grad school: to learn how to make difficult decisions while trying to balance budget constraints, politics, equity and feasibility of implementation. It's certainly still a lot of work but it's ultimately rewarding and fulfilling.

Strengthening weak muscles

Since this Master of Public Affairs program is one calendar year (accelerated), there's considerable pressure to get your sh*t together, and get it together quickly. I need to "pick a lane," so to speak, in the next month or so. There is the more technical, quantitative lane, or the more qualitative, advocacy-oriented lane. I've already established that I'm stronger in the latter and weaker in the former. So should I play to my strengths or risk going out of my comfort zone?

For the past few weeks I have been hitting the gym (at 7am, may I add) with my classmate David. It's the first time I've done any serious weight training since 2015 (shoutout to Andreas!). Consequently getting back into the groove has been a bit of a struggle. I can barely lift five pounds for a triceps drill, curl 20 lbs or squat the bar (45 lb). After every session my muscles riot and are sore for days. I laugh when I hit failure at eight reps. "Believe," I urge myself, laughing, as David looks on and also laughs.

Metaphorically, I think of the left side of my brain like I think of my atrophied muscles struggling to wake up after a long slumber. There's potential there, but I have to exert a considerable amount of will to use them in any sustained capacity. After the first week of statistics and economics I was in full-on panic mode. "I hate this!!" was my frequent inner monologue. By week four, though I was by no means achieving proficiency in any of the presented concepts, I was able to celebrate the accomplishment of surviving the course (see my last post) and appreciate the fact that I learned something (which, all things considered, is better than nothing). So despite the fact that quantitative reasoning doesn't come naturally to me, and despite the fact that I don't particularly enjoy it, I am seriously considering continuing down the left-brained path knowing full well that I will struggle the entire time.

One drawback of being an overachiever is that it's tough for me to not be the top of the class. I remember in elementary school I used to love that when we got our math packets my peers would automatically congregate around me to work through things because they trusted my general competence with the material. If I go down the data-driven policy track, I need to be okay with just being in the middle of the pack or *gasp* at the bottom. I'm considering a fall semester full of technical electives (budgeting, GIS and Python). Is this irrational or inadvisable?

This week the instructor of the Python course held an information session where he summarized a daunting menu of concepts and projects (I started feeling anxious as he advanced through each subsequent Power Point slide). Afterwards I went up to speak with him. "Hi, I'm April, I talked to you on the phone earlier this year about the course." His face lit up in recognition. "Oh yeah! Hi April, so glad you decided to come to Brown." When I expressed my trepidation about the course (I specifically asked what supports were in place for students throughout the semester), Prof. Prasad assured me that there would be two course assistants and that he was more than happy to help students out personally. "We want you to succeed," he assured me.

That statement really stuck with me. In what other situation will I have such a safe environment in which to make mistakes, stumble and fail, knowing someone will be there to help? If I am going to really go out of my depth, I think now is the time to do it.

Other miscellaneous stuff

Apart from all these existential musings, though, I've just been living a regular life and enjoying it immensely:

We have had the enormous privilege of hearing from practitioners who are working in local government, private consulting and non-profits. I am so fond of these passionate eggheads. One of them literally said, "There is an event horizon at the singularity," and I had to stifle a laugh. They also bring the heart. Someone in international development today advised, "Listen so deeply that you invite the person you are with to share." That rocked me to my core. "My soul feels hugged right now," I confessed to my classmate Suhaib following that session.
It has been really, really hot this week. Not only are temperatures in the mid 80s to low 90s, to add insult to injury, humidity sometimes hovers around 92 percent. Are you kidding me?? "I feel like I could box the air!" David proclaimed to me as we stepped out from the Dunkin' Donuts into the night. I finally caved and purchased a window-mounted air conditioning unit for my room, so it's manageable. Today I entered the living room and cried, "Oh my god! It is so hot out here! Practically tropical!"
Visitors!! Sometimes I get a little homesick being out here on the East Coast, so seeing folks from the West Coast makes my heart so happy. I met Marie in college and now she's in the D.C. area. She was able to stop by on her way to Boston with her husband, Jackson. It was lovely to catch up with her (the last time I saw her was in April when doing college tours). And you know we took full advantage and played Pokemon Go together. We caught three Zapdos each and Jackson even got a shiny one!
I also had the pleasure of seeing the Shimada family, who also stopped by on their way to Boston. It was so nice to see them!! They brought the chill bay area vibes. We got boba and I honestly felt like I was back in California. Cry!! I gotta get back there ASAP.
Speaking of travel, on the 18th I'm headed to Johannesburg, South Africa, for 10 days as part of the MPA program. Our host site is the Public Affairs Research Institute which conducts analyses on government institutions and their (dys)functions. Right up my alley! Moreover South Africa is in a period of tremendous change and transition with the recent ouster of former president and known kleptocrat Jacob Zuma. I'll have access to WiFi so will do my best to provide some brief updates while I'm there. I'm really looking forward to rooming with my classmates Nya and Jill (I requested that one day we all wear our jumpsuits) and getting to know Africa. This will be my first time to the continent!